“I Can’t Sleep The Whole Night” – Woman After Arranged Marriage

Written by Dhiwaharan Published on Dec 15, 2020 | 06:08 AM IST | 333

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A Facebook post of an alleged 27 year old female about the trauma she went through on the night of her marriage which was arranged by her parents, grabbed the attention of Tamil twitter users. An arranged marriage occurs when a couple embraces the legal bonds of matrimony because of the planning and agreement of their guardians or families. The bride and groom may have little say in the matter because their parents and extended relatives negotiate the relationship as if it were a business arrangement.

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The major problem of an arranged marriage occurs most often when the couple in question does not have time to meet with one another before the ceremony. Both individuals can enter into matrimony willingly so that it isn’t a forced marriage, but that doesn’t change the fact that there can be a lack of trust. Some people in this situation are forced into a place of intimacy with someone who is a complete stranger, yet they are also a spouse.

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The Facebook post of the woman which is doing rounds in social media, makes us realize how women are suffering through the marriages arranged by the parents. “I literally have no one to cry to which made me to write this post” the woman starts sharing the traumatic experience she went through. She who got married on the day before writing the post, says that she was not comfortable in having a physical relationship with someone with whom she was just chatting for past three months.

“I couldn’t say “hey i am ready, let’s sleep” all of a sudden as they have raised me by asking to stay away from men.” the post read. When she explained the husband about her issue, he asked her the reason behind it. According to the post, he reasoned the time defined by the astrologer and tried to tell their parents to look for some other time. When she requested him not to tell about it to the parents, the husband compelled his newly married wife to have physical relationship with him.

“It looked like a decent blackmail and I had no other options. I simply slept and felt like I am being raped.” the woman’s post read. He too didn’t care and slept with a smiling face. I can’t sleep the whole night and was weeping. The worst part about it is, I was supposed to pretend like I had a great night the next day” she said and concluded her post by asking “Is marriage a certificate to have sex?” and added that it feels disgusting.

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Though it is unknown whether the post was written by a woman, it created a debate in social media platforms. While many people understood the emotions of the woman, some opposed it asking “what would the husband do ?” and “why couldn’t she say it prior marriage?”

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